A tribute to Shiloh…

The 2023 National Western Stock Show and Rodeo has concluded.  It’s a major event in Denver and it’s also one of the first, big, rodeos to start off the 2023 competitive circuit for the PRCA – Professional Rodeo Cowboys Association as well as the PBR – Professional Bull Riders. 

I’ve written before that I’m no cowboy.  I didn’t even grow up among large farm animals.  A Chicago suburbanite was my childhood and high school setting.  Attending college in rural, western Illinois I do remember that certain aroma constantly permeating the air.  Attending the National Western brought back that vivid memory.  Talk to a rancher, farmer, or cowboy about it and they will usually shrug and say it, “smells like money”. 

I learned about that side of the aroma myself, when my son and wife decided we should adopt wild horses from the Bureau of Land Management.  Adopt we did – 4 mustangs in all.  Our last, Kahlua (on the right), is still grazing in our back yard.  And yes, our backyard, “smells like money”. 

It’s funny how you can bump into horse people these days without even knowing on surface that they are horse people. 

I met a Best-Selling Author recently, Rodney Barker (see www.rodneybarkerauthor.com ).  Turns out we have many things in common; both graduates of Knox College; both college athletes (he played football, I played basketball); both writers (he’s successful, I’m well let’s call it “aspiring”).  We are also both horse people. 

Rodney has extended his affection for horses into quite a unique and beautifully artistic pursuit (see www.trailofpaintedponies.com ).  Further coincidence, Rod’s horse is named Shyloh; mine was named Shiloh. 

I say “was”, because my Shiloh died a couple of years ago.  Heartbreaking as every horse owner knows. 

Another horse owner, Amy Fear-Helbok, a graduate of Westernaires who rode with my son (Westernaires was the organization that introduced our family to the traditions of the American West and the beauty of our wild American Mustangs.  See www.westernaires.org ) posted this tribute on Facebook when her horse died: 

The Rainbow Bridge For Horses 

By the edge of a woods,

at the foot of a hill,

Is a lush, green meadow

where time stands still.

Where the friends of man

and woman do run,

when their time on earth

is over and done.

 

For here, between this world

and the next,

Is a place where

beloved creatures find rest. 

On this golden land,

they wait and they play

Til The Rainbow Bridge

they cross over one day.

 

No more do they suffer,

in pain or in sadness,

For here they are whole,

their lives filled with gladness. 

Their limbs are restored,

their health renewed. 

Their bodies have healed

with strength imbued.

 

They trot through the grass

without even a care,

Til one day they whinny

and sniff at the air. 

All ears prick forward,

eyes sharp and alert.

Then all of a sudden,

one breaks from the herd.

 

For just at that second,

there’s no room for remorse. 

As they see each other…

one person… one horse.

So they run to each other,

these friends from long past

The time of their parting

is over at last.

 

The sadness they felt

while they were apart

Has turned to joy

once more in each heart. 

They nuzzle with a love

that will last forever. 

And then, side-by-side,

                they cross over… together.                                                           

Author Unknown 

I too will reunite with Shiloh one day and cross that bridge. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Luv rules…

Next Tuesday is Valentine’s Day – it’s not too late.  There’s still time to do something special for that special person. 

OK – so I can’t take credit for creating this awesome display of love for my love.  That was someone else’s awesome display of their love for their love.  Can I take “observation credit” for stopping along the roadside while driving through this western Illinois farming community to take the picture?  I think my wife will give me credit for a little kind-hearted, photo-plagiarism because I know she knows: 

Love rules without rules. 

Italian Proverb 

Who says men are oblivious and have no powers of observation?  OK – so a billboard is hard to miss.  Observing that man’s demonstration of love reminds us all that Tuesday, no assumptions; no taking her for granted; no obliviousness; no subtleties are allowed.  On Valentine’s Day, we must shout our love for our love from the top of the mountains!  And yes, we hope our women do the same for the men in their lives: 

You know “That Look” women get when they want sex?  Me neither. 

Steve Martin 

Tuesday may be a special day in my marriage, but our relationship over the years has taken constant care (and patience).  Thankfully, my wife has patience: 

Patience strengthens the spirit,

   sweetens the temper,

      stifles anger,

    extinguishes envy,

  subdues pride,

bridles the tongue,

   restrains the hand,

      and tramples upon temptation. 

George Horne 

It’s easier to be patient with the little things I suppose.   But when times get tough, the most convenient person to argue with, vent to, and take our frustrations out on is often our partner, true?  Life seems to move so fast; people seem to be so stressed; the media inundates us with so many sensationalized issues. 

I don’t know; are meaningful, loving partnerships easier or harder to find these days?  With everything racing at a break-neck pace, who’s responsible for maintaining a healthy, loving, long-lasting relationship?  Well, here’s a view from Wyatt Webb: 

You are 100 percent responsible for 50 percent of any relationship. 

Carrying more than ½ the load you say?  Yep – you and my wife, too. 

Thankfully, my wife and I are still in love after all of these years.  We will do something quiet this Valentine’s Day; we enjoy our quiet time together - always have.  We’re blessed with sharing many common interests, so spending time together and “decompressing” from our fast-paced life is a nice retreat. 

Like you, our conversations will span a variety of topics; children; friends; happy memories; love.  Of course, when we’re together we will also synchronize our calendars; debate upcoming projects; disagree on priorities; discuss business; and almost always review our finances.  Yuck!  Necessary I suppose, but not very romantic. 

Yet this Valentine’s Day I will be reminded: 

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. 

Mignon McLaughlin 

So here’s to February 14^th – Valentine’s Day.  May you enjoy it with someone special in your life.  If you’re lucky enough to be in love, may you cherish your quiet time together; sharing common interests; being patient with life’s challenges; relishing the restorative results of romance. 

And if you’re with someone but you’re not yet sure if he or she is “the one”, don’t worry – trust your gut feeling: 

Love is not finding someone you can live with; it’s finding someone you cannot live without. 

Rafael Ortiz 

Love rules without rules on Valentine’s Day – and every day. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective. 

Land the plane…

I feel that I am similar to you.  When we have an idea, anecdote, or opinion on our mind we like to share it with others, true?  We try to be a patient receiver when we’re on the listening side as well, but we know that can be a challenge. 

In my case, it’s not “what” I have to share but rather “how” I share it that is worrisome.  If you look up the definition of “verbose” you’ll find several definitions.  Perhaps the most appropriate for today’s purpose is: 

Wordy 

Guilty.  

I’d like you to know that I’m not blind to my tendency to “throw more words at it”.  That’s a common trait many salespeople have.  When we don’t know the answer to a prospect’s question, when there is dead space, or when we’re nervous, we have a tendency to hold onto the talking stick too long.  

I bet you’ve been in that situation on the “buy-side” of a sales presentation.  You ask the salesperson a question and after sitting through a lengthy, sometimes confusing, occasionally contradicting response you decide not to ask any more questions for fear you’ll have to bring in dinner before the sales rep leaves. 

I’m retired from the technology sales profession now, but still selling.  I prefer to think of it as story-telling.  Either way, deep down inside I want my audience to listen to me and to like what I have to say.  I bet you do, too.  Thanks to a long-time friend of mine, Debbie Ryder, now I can tell.  She cued me during lunch recently.  I was relating something or other I thought was of interest.  When I started heading down the wordy path she smiled and said, “Gary, land the plane.” 

Similar feedback was offered by my friends Pat and Monica.  Two steps involved with preparing to self- publish my book, The Peace and Power of a Positive Perspective, are a “Summary” as well as “About” the author.  After sending them a draft they responded firmly and politely, “wordy”.  

I suppose my readers (all readers really) take a different approach with writers; even apologetic writers: 

I apologize for writing such a long letter. I didn’t have the time to write you a short one. 

Pascal   

Readers simply stop reading, yes?  Here’s a test… how many of your incoming emails and instant messages do you read start to finish?  Makes one want to tell the writer, “Land the plane”.  This is not a new phenomenon, just ask Norman R. Augustine: 

There are those individuals, both outside the federal government and inside, who are endowed with that special talent to take fairly lucid concepts and, through subtle embellishment, make them very nearly incomprehensible. 

Ah yes, embellishment, guilty again.  But in my defense, it’s not because I’m oblivious to my verbosity: 

If I am to speak for ten minutes, I need a week for preparation; if fifteen minutes, three days; if half an hour, two days; if an hour, I am ready now. 

Woodrow Wilson 

I try to heed the advice from Pascal and Norm Augustine.  I’ve read much about Abraham Lincoln.  Sometimes I worry that he was referring to me: 

He can compress the most words into the smallest ideas of any man I ever met. 

Abraham Lincoln 

So if you find one of my little ditties is too wordy for a small idea, please feel free to hit reply and say, “Gary, land the plane”. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

The National Western…

If it’s January; and it’s Denver; then it’s the National Western Stock Show and Rodeo!  Ever been?  I love being around farmers, ranchers, cowboys, and horse people.  I love their values of God, country, and family.  I love their work ethic, centered around kids, crops, and critters.  I love their commitment! 

We can learn a lot from cowboy wisdom: 

Don’t squat with your spurs on. 

Never drink downstream from the herd. 

                   Texas Bix Bender 

My wife is a horse person; my younger son, his wife, and my granddaughter, too.  Coming from the Chicago suburbs, I live with a whole different “herd” now: 

My husband said if I don’t sell my horses, he will leave me.  Some days I miss him. 

Unknown Sage 

My wife was the National Western’s embroiderer.  Over the course of a 16-day, 8am to 10pm, non-stop stretch, she would embroider 100+ champion coats for the Events Center equestrian event winners.  That along with operating her booth making personalized horse halters, dog collars and leashes… 8am to 10pm;16 straight days; non-stop.  That’s commitment! 

My favorite National Western event each year is the draft horse competition.  On the surface, the audience sees the power and beauty of the teams.  They certainly exemplify western values as written about in James P. Owen’s book, Cowboy Ethics ©: 

Ride for the brand. 

Those in the know appreciate what it takes below the surface.  Talk about commitment!  The training hours alone preparing to compete in a venue such as the National Western Stock Show & Rodeo are indescribable.  Not to mention the small fortune required. 

In this picture from 2018 there are 14, 6-draft-horse teams (That’s about 84 tons of horse!). You’re also looking at

          over           eight           million          dollars!           

Here’s my math:  $105,000 for tack (42 sets of harnesses, hitches, and reins x $2,500 per set; 3 pairs per team - 2 horses are the wheel team; 2 horses are the swing team; and 2 are the lead team, all with special fitting, matching tack); 14 show wagons with trailer @ $25,000 each = $350,000; 14 pick-up trucks to haul the show wagon trailers @ $70,000 each = $980,000; 14 tractor-trailers to haul the 84 draft horses @ $110,000 each = $1,554,000; and 84 show draft horses @ $60,000 each average public auction price = $5,040,000. All in, that’s $8, 029,000. 

Those millions don’t cover the cost of hay (50 pounds of hay per horse per day x 84 horses x $5 per pound x 365 days = $7,665,000); plus grain (50 pounds of grain per day…); plus shoeing… plus veterinarian … plus fuel for the vehicles for hauling… plus, plus, plus.  And that’s in 2018 dollars! 

The $2,500 prize money for the 1^st place team (along with two “Champion” jackets provided by the National Western Stock Show and embroidered by my wife) was certainly not the reason these folks competed. 

While others watched NFL playoffs on TV, these teamsters were filling water troughs; grooming horses; polishing tack and wagons; mucking manure.  They all know one another and enjoy visiting with fellow competitors.  While caring for their critters, they even eat their meals in the barn.  Commitment! 

Western folks are committed to our U S of A, too.  During the National Western, at the start of every day, as well as before each rodeo, everyone stands and “removes cover” for the singing of our National Anthem. 

Yep – I love the National Western Stock Show and Rodeo! 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Highly Sensitive?

Each day can be a real test for sensitive types, true?  If you are a highly sensitive person; you’re not alone.  According to “Nine Signs You’re a Highly Sensitive Person” published in “Productivity, What Inspires Me”: 

Sensitive people get a bad rap. Research suggests that genes are responsible for the 15–20% of people who qualify as “highly sensitive.” … who experience sounds, feelings, and even the presence of other people much more intensely than the average person. 

“…much more intensely…” I love that!  Intensity and sensitivity applied together creates a tremendous advantage. 

Back to the article: 

Highly sensitive people’s strong emotions are easier to identify (and potentially use to their benefit) than the average person …

 The Highly Sensitive Person:

1. You think deeply.

When life throws you a curveball, you retreat deep into your shell, thinking through every aspect of what transpired before taking any action. Small things (in your own life and other people’s lives) can have a big impact on you.

2. You’re detail-oriented.

You’re as sensitive to details as you are to feelings. You see details that others miss, and you aren’t content until you’ve dotted all the i’s and crossed the t’s. This is a strength that is highly valuable in the right profession.

3. You take longer to reach decisions.

Since you’re prone to dig deep beneath the surface, you tend to drag out decisions. You can’t help but try to run every possible outcome through your head, and this is often at the expense of the ticking clock.

4. You’re crushed by bad decisions.

When you finally make a decision, and it turns out to be a poor choice, you take it much harder than most. This can create a vicious cycle that slows down your decision-making process even more, as fear of making a bad decision is part of what slows you down in the first place.

5. You’re emotionally reactive.

When left to your own devices, you have a knee-jerk reaction to your feelings. You also have strong reactions to what other people are going through. When your emotions come on strong, it’s easy to let them hijack your behavior.

6. You take criticism harshly.

Your strong feelings and intense emotional reactions can make criticism hard to take. Though you may overreact to criticism initially, you also have the tendency to think hard about things and explore them deeply. This exploration of criticism can play out well for you in the long run, as your inability to “shrug it off” helps you make the appropriate changes.

7. You work well in teams.

Your unique ability to take other people’s feelings into account, weigh different aspects of multifaceted decisions, and pay attention to the smaller details makes you extremely valuable in a team environment.

8. You have great manners.

Your heightened awareness of the emotions of other people makes you highly conscientious. You pay close attention to how your behavior affects other people and have the good manners to show for it. You also get particularly irked when other people are rude.

9. Open offices drive you crazy.

Your sensitivity to other people, loud noises, and other stimuli makes it practically impossible for you to work effectively in an open-office environment. You’re better off in a cube or working from home.

You may not align with all nine attributes but if these “ring true” you may be a highly sensitive person.  I salute your intensity! 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Warriors…

Welcome to the new year!  I hope it’s your best year yet.  Not sure how it will go?  Worried about a recession; global warming; road rage; and all of the frights we deal with every day - real or imagined?  Me too. 

The good new is we reached 2023 because we overcame those daily frights, real or imagined, in 2022 and years before.  Let’s tune into that great, inner strength again this year.  Let’s be warriors! 

Fate whispers to the warrior, "You cannot withstand the storm." The warrior whispers back, "I am the storm." 

Unknown Sage

Odds are we will experience adversity in 2023.  Facing adversity makes us better; helps us win.  It dates back to ancient times: 

ADVERSITY: 

Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents, which, in prosperous circumstances, would have lain dormant. 

Horace 

Of course, how they persevered in Roman times may not transfer to who we need to be today.  What inner strength should we summon to succeed in 2023?  Dare we claim to be a “warrior”?  The Daily Bible Verse suggests this alternative: 

Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city. 

Proverbs 16:32 

Both ancient references associate the term “warrior” with it’s origin from the word “war”.  Let’s not literally go to war in 2023, OK?  I prefer the broader definition found in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary ©: 

Warrior (noun): a person engaged in some struggle or conflict 

Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about!

To be fair, there are those who struggle to win and then there are those who “struggle”!  Regardless, winning by overcoming our struggles is best accomplished by keeping our patience and perhaps our perspective, too.  As you know, I profess there is both peace and power in maintaining a positive perspective. 

David S. Pottruck provides this positive perspective of a winning struggle in the face of competition; emphasizing what truly matters in life: 

Let your imagination put you in a grandstand at the Seattle version of the Special Olympics.  There are nine contestants, all physically or mentally disabled, assembled at the starting line for the 100-yard dash.  At the gun, they all start out, not exactly in a dash, but with relish to run the race to the finish and win.  All, that is, except one boy who stumbles on the asphalt, tumbles over a couple of times, and begins to cry.  The other eight hear the boy cry.  They slow down and look back.  They all turn around and go back… every one of them.  As you watch, one girl with Down’s Syndrome bends down and kisses him.  You hear her say, “This will make it better.”  All nine link arms and walk across the finish line together.  Everyone in the stadium, including you, stands up, and the cheering goes on for several minutes.  People who were actually there are still telling the story, four years later.  Why?  Because deep down we know this one thing:  What matters in this life is helping others win, even if it means changing our own course.                   

I love stories of people who face their struggles and overcome conflicts.  I love people who are tenacious; relentless; and unwavering in the face of adversity.  I love winners.  And I love those who help others win! 

It’s easy to say; might be hard for us to do in 2023.  But 

Do           we           will 

because we know what matters.  Afterall, we are warriors! 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Customer Service?

I don’t mean to trigger negativity; lots of things are going wrong these days.  You, me, and Roger?  Well, we have a choice: 

If things go wrong, don’t go with them. 

Roger Babson 

My wife is a seller on Amazon Handmade.  If you buy on Amazon you might not know that Amazon controls all correspondence between buyers and sellers.  The seller cannot directly contact a buyer – all emails and phone calls flow through Amazon’s computers; text is not available.  Soo, if there is a problem with a customer’s order AND if there’s a problem with the seller’s account on Amazon, that combination creates a real problem. 

Now this particular problem was miniscule when compared to the words “Southwest Airlines” but to my wife who has maintained a perfect, on time shipping record with Amazon for the past four years and received exclusively 5-star reviews from her customers, the problem was anything but miniscule. 

On December 17^th, due to suspected credit card fraud on her account, Amazon locked her out of her seller’s log-in plunging my wife into Amazon’s technology abyss.  To get through to Amazon Seller Customer Service she first had to log into her account; Amazon had locked her out of her account; no other Amazon Customer Service department could help her. 

Every single day for the next 12 days she received an email from Amazon’s computers  instructing her to log into her account and rectify the discrepancy.  Every single day for the next 12 days she replied to Amazon’s computers plus called Amazon’s Customer Service department re-informing them that first they had to unlock her account access.  

Every           single            day… 

But one thing for sure; when you wrestle with a 500-pound gorilla, you rest when the gorilla wants to. 

Unknown Sage 

Meanwhile… she had this personalized horse halter order for a new customer in Georgia.  She had sent the finished halter prior to December 17^th, but the customer (emailing through Amazon’s computers) said she didn’t receive it.  (The package was probably sitting among the airline baggage we all saw pictures of.) 

My wife decided to make a replacement but; she didn’t have the customer’s contact information or order details (all that was stored in the Amazon computer she was locked out of).  She did have a copy of the customer’s delivery address. 

Googling the customer’s name and address amazingly a phone number and email appeared.  Unfortunately, that contact information must have been outdated; her call wouldn’t go through and her email bounced.  However, Google listed neighbors of her customer and their phone numbers.  My wife started calling.  Undaunted, she called until reaching someone. 

To that someone, my wife explained why she was trying to contact this person’s neighbor.  She was convincing enough that this good Samaritan gave my wife her neighbor’s number and said she would text her neighbor to let her know my wife would be calling.  When my wife called; her customer answered.  My wife explained why she was going around Amazon’s computers; and the customer provided the specifics of the horse halter she originally ordered. 

My wife manufactured the replacement halter and drove it directly to the post office for delivery within two hours of that call.  The customer’s horse halter (a Christmas gift for her 16-year-old daughter) was now in USPS’ (and God’s) hands. 

On December 23^rd the customer informed my wife she received her daughter’s gift and all was well. 

Now THAT’s what I call Customer Service! 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.