Rules…

Now there is a word that stimulates lively conversation, true?  When someone tells us not to “break the “rules”, I sometimes feel we take actually it as a challenge, LOL!  Other times when we see some blatant infraction we’re not as understanding, are we.  Speeding and weaving on the highway gets my goat.  Others too I’d say, based on increased incidents of “road rage”. 

I get it…  we like to believe that rules are for those “other people”.  Afterall, we have a good reason why we need to break the rules, don’t we?  Malcolm Forbes reminds us there’s even a rule for that: 

There are no exceptions to the rule that everybody likes to be the exception to the rule. 

People my age like to point at those darn young people!  Do you think its generational?  Well, breaking rules has been occurring regularly over the years; occasionally for the greater good: 

Rules?  There ain't no rules here.  We're trying to accomplish something. 

Thomas Edison 

Truly, there are rules and then there are rules.  Like you, I feel some of today’s rules are stupid, especially those dreamed up by our elected officials: 

To the government, cutting red tape often means slicing it into long strips lengthwise. 

Norman R. Augustine 

Have you ever noticed how someone responds with an excuse or explanation when they get caught breaking some rule?  I bet it happens often – and yes, I’m guilty.  However, when it comes to business performance, personal success, and related, heeding rules can make a real difference. 

Rules help us with all sorts of things in life, big and little.  For instance, Thomas L. Friedman offers us this practical rule: 

The First Rule of Intelligent Tinkering: 

Save all the parts. 

There are rules to help us at the other end of the little to big spectrum, also.  I read Tony Dungy’s book, Quiet Strength © recently.  I especially liked his approach to performance.  The context was professional football but I think it applies beyond sports.  Short, sweet, applicable to so many situations - “No excuses.  No explanations.”  Here’s how Tony put it: 

I told them that I expected our team to live and play by the concept, Whatever it Takes, then ended with a second basic phrase which I posted in our locker room, No excuses. No explanations. 

                   Tony Dungy 

I’m not sure when or why we began over reliance on excuses and explanations.  Maybe it’s not more common today than the generations before us but it sure feels so.  (People parking in handicapped spaces with the excuse that they’re elderly or overweight vs. those with true handicaps gets my goat.) 

On the other hand, maybe it’s my goat that needs adjusting.  I mean it’s not like someone is taking my parking space.  I don’t park in handicapped.  Those zooming past me on the highway are the ones that risk getting a ticket or getting in an accident, not me.  I’m not the traffic enforcer. 

What’s best for me is to focus on those rules that make a difference in my life.  You know, healthy diet; courtesy towards others; contributing my fair share; honoring my family; operating dangerous machinery safely; keeping my commitments; and of course, minding pool rules:

Did Nordstrom get office rules right perchance? 

Nordstrom Rules: 

Rule # 1 - Use your good judgment in all situations. 

   There will be no additional rules. 

Bob Nelson 

Now there’s a rule we should follow.  No excuses.  No explanations. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

We remember…

I never served in the military.  I didn’t want to in those years of social upheaval.  My draft number during the Vietnam War was 271.  Now, I can only imagine the commitment, self-sacrifice, and bravery our country’s veterans must have had to preserve our way of life.  Today, our armed forces continue the tradition. 

On Memorial Day we will pause to remember those who served; who sacrificed; who died; for our country; for our freedom.  It is a “day of remembrance”. 

According to Wikipedia this history of remembrance goes back 155 years: 

In 1868, General John A. Logan of the Grand Army of the Republic called for a "Decoration Day", which was widely celebrated. By 1890, every Northern state had adopted it as a holiday. The World Wars turned it into a generalized day of remembrance, instead of just for the Civil War. 

The struggle for our freedom continues.  We Americans must address many difficulties.   This is nothing new.  What “weapons” will we use?  

David Major is Course Director for Senior Enlisted Blended Seminar Program for Marine Corps University.  He teaches a leadership class, Law of War and Profession of Arms at the Marine Corps Base in Quantico, Virginia.  In David’s class one of the leaders cited is General Charles C. Krulak: 

The military has a tradition of producing great leaders that possess the highest ethical standards and integrity.  It produces men and women of character. 

Were those the “weapons” you were thinking of?  Ethical standards; integrity; character?  

It’s easy to turn our media-fueled attention towards our country’s leaders.  It’s easy to criticize the behaviors we’re seeing from our elected officials.  Before going too far down that path though, General Krulak offers additional guidance: 

Based on (character), we commit to doing what is right.  We expect such commitment from our leaders.  But most importantly, we must demand it of ourselves. 

Character; integrity; ethical standards; doing what is right; these are the weapons we all must use to protect our freedom.  David Major goes on: 

Ethical decision-making reflects a cognitive process by which one makes decisions based on value judgements. While influences such as culture, upbringing, religion, nationality, and organizational culture can shape our ethics, ultimately, values-based decision-making is often a matter of personal choice. 

Ahh, adding-in value-based decision-making and personal choice.  Combine those with integrity and we increase the power to protect America’s freedom.  Back to General Krulak: 

My challenge to you is simple but often very difficult…  wear your armor of integrity… find comfort in its protection… do not become lax.  And always remember that no one can take your integrity from you…  you and only you can give it away! 

Each of us.  It’s our choice.  Only in America can cultures of diversity live together united.  Truly, we have our differences and there is plenty of strife.  Americans have much work to do in the pursuit of a more perfect union: 

In every community, there is work to be done. 

In every nation, there are wounds to heal. 

In every heart, there is the power to do it.  

Marianne Williamson 

On Memorial Day let’s remember.  Let’s pause our work to honor the men and women of our military; especially those who made the ultimate sacrifice: 

Then let’s go back to work Tuesday – with character; integrity; ethical standards; using personal choice to do what’s right; leveraging value-based decision-making; and our hearts! 

Yes Marianne, “In every heart, there is the power to do it!” 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Mental Health

Tough topic today… but it’s always been a tough topic.  And it takes tough people to deal with it.  According to research: 

Mental health has grown to be an outsized problem in the United States, with 90% of Americans saying it is now a crisis.

Let’s be more aware when we ask someone, “How are you doing?”  If we hear, “I’m doing alright” it can mean so much more.  Like Eric: 

I have known Eric for 47 years tomorrow – his birthday.  Over that period Eric’s Mom and Dad have shared some of his most joyous occasions and some of his most upsetting events.  In between these highs and lows Eric would tell you that he has been doing alright.  For Eric, doing alright shows how amazing he truly is. 

You see, Eric is the toughest person I know.  I’ll give you an example.  Close your eyes and return to the happiest day of your life – feel how you felt during your most exhilarating moments.  OK, now think back to how you felt on your saddest, darkest, most depressed day ever.  Set those mental bookmarks in your mind’s eye.  There is an unbelievably wide and powerful range of human emotion, yes?  

For most of us, we migrate from our highest highs to our lowest lows slowly; with long, “recovery” spans of simply feeling average in between.  Unfortunately, Eric is different.  His mood swings back and forth, between euphoric highs and debilitating lows in a matter of minutes - multiple times - every hour!  Now picture your life with his type of mood swings – as if our other challenges aren’t enough to deal with.  

Rapid Cycling – that’s the term for Eric and others who suffer from Bi-Polar Disorder.  Eric lives every day with this unwelcome guest.  Medical science is not much help.  Bi-Polar Disorder is an affliction of the brain, very difficult to properly diagnose and treat.  Trial and error, mostly.  That means people with Bi-Polar Disorder typically wind up dealing with this on their own. 

Most can’t hold down a steady job.  Eric can – and he has consistently been a “go to” person for his company.  He is a skilled tradesman; good with customers; dependable; hard working; shows up no matter what; a positive attitude; an outlook that no job is too tough; that’s Eric.  Most people with Bi-Polar Disorder can’t live independently.  Eric does – and if you met him, you would never know the internal turmoil that lives with him.  He has a pleasant personality; a nice sense of humor; knowledgeable of current events; just like the rest of us. 

But Eric isn’t like the rest of us.  Merely getting up and facing the day; every day; takes enormous strength.  He offers no excuses – never has.  Eric has earned success and experienced failure.  No matter; Eric treats each day anew, the best he possibly can. When you greet him with, “Hi. How you doing?”  you will almost always hear him say, “I’m doing alright”.  

If Eric is tough enough to be “alright” each and every day even though feeling uncontrollable mood swings – should we do any less?  

No, I don’t have Bi-Polar Disorder, but it lives next door. Although I don’t have it, I can see first-hand the toughness Eric has as he lives with it.  Eric is my son and I’m proud of him.  One day I hope to learn the source of his amazing toughness so I too can be, “doing alright”. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.