Day by day…

Happy Anniversary Debbie! 

Tomorrow marks 53 years.  That’s 19,345 days.  A significant amount of time to be with one’s significant other, true? 

In reality it’s actually more when I add in the days we were engaged and the days we dated, all the way back to before our high school prom in 1970:

Many of you are in a long-lasting relationship; many have been married longer than we.  A Mile High Salute to you!  Maybe our relationship thrived because I was a “Road Warrior” for several years?  A colleague of mine once said:           

The secret to a long marriage is a husband that travels. 

Lisa Kwiecien 

I like to write about my wife frequently.  Like any couple, we have our good days and our not-so-good days.  Like many couples, we’ve also had some of those relationship-testing; foundation-rattling; we’re-not-going-to-make-it; kind of days.  When those days occur we follow James P. Owen’s advice: 

When you’re riding through hell… keep riding. 

Any meaningful journey is like that, don’t you think?  Even one of America’s most famous sweethearts offered this guidance on life’s journey: 

Pain nourishes courage.  You can’t be brave if you’ve only had wonderful things happen to you. 

Mary Tyler Moore 

Throughout our relationship we’ve had more than our share of wonderful things happen; all driven by love.  In fact, 53 years ago this month the #1 song on the Billboard Hot 100 was “Love Train” by the O’Jays.  According to Wikipedia: 

The word 'train' comes from the Old French trahiner, from the Latin trahere meaning pull, or draw. 

My wife has pulled us along on that love train for 53 years!  I’ve tried to pay attention to the little things that make a difference day by day; lighten her load a bit; smooth the tracks.  Rob Gilbert made a list: 

How to have a Winning Day: 

You have to listen more than you talk…

You have to smile more than you frown…

You have to be fascinated more than you're frustrated…

You have to believe in yourself more than you doubt yourself.

You have to work more than you whine.

You have to do more than you don't.

I have also paid attention to my boundaries: 

Men ordering custom colors must first bring in a note from their wife. 

Guiry Paint Store 

It’s OK; she writes the notes; I run the errands; we make a great team.  And on those occasional occasions where disagreement looms, we heed Harlan Miller’s advice: 

Often the difference between a successful marriage and a mediocre one consists of leaving three or four things a day unsaid.

19,345 days and still rolling strong.  No matter our future course; no matter the challenges we face; the trials that will test us; not even the weather we may encounter; our love train will continue – pulled along by my high school sweetheart.  Even if an icy wind blows hard in our face, Etheridge Knight’s words will continue to guide us: 

Love is a rock against the wind. 

Happy 53^rd  Anniversary Dear!  You’re my rock and I love you. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.