High School Sweethearts…

We just returned from our fifty year high school reunion.   It was titled 50 +1 because our actual fifty year mark from high school graduation occurred in 2021.  Due to the pandemic, our gathering was pushed back one year to assure the best time possible could be had by all.  High school had such an impact on my life that I like to post this little ditty each October and reminisce about that joyful time. 

Fall; October; football; high school; Homecoming – do you remember your first high school sweetheart?  High school is a very special and memorable time for teenagers; it certainly was for me.  And I always enjoyed the autumn season when I was in high school – Homecoming; Halloween; dating; parties (most chaperoned, some not). 

Fifty two years ago, this very time of the year, I asked the prettiest girl in my high school out on a first date.  I guess it went well enough because here we are fifty two years later, and I’m still awe-struck by the glow of her beauty. 

I hope you enjoy this opening to Chapter XII True North of my book, The Peace & Power of a Positive Perspective © as much I enjoyed writing it: 

Dedicated to… a crisp night in October; with a slight breeze blowing through bare trees – waiting for the coming winter.   Close your eyes.  Can you smell remnants of autumn leaves burning? 

To winning the homecoming football game.  To being carefree. To a Saturday night party at the teenager’s house whose parents are away.  Can you hear the kids having fun in the kitchen; the basement; and the backyard, all to the beat of the Rolling Stones? 

To couches, blue jeans and sweaters.  To the floor lamp reflecting on her blond hair making it shimmer with silvery streaks of light.  To the nervous small talk of a teenage boy in the presence of a varsity cheerleader.  To the patience of the teenage girl sitting on the couch with the captain of the varsity basketball team.  Can you remember when you could actually hear your heart throbbing? 

To throw pillows, which come in handy when the small talk runs out – what else can a young boy do?  And to playful pillow fights; which lead to gentle wrestling and ultimately to that first kiss. Remember how delicate she felt in your arms – the hint of her perfume – the taste of her lips? 

To first dates – dinner and a movie.  To the movie Catch 22 and the Oriental Theatre in downtown Chicago.  To dating the prettiest girl in your high school; to falling in love; to asking her father’s permission for her hand in marriage.  Were you ever so nervous? 

To the tears welling up in my eyes even as I write this short memoire.  To all those emotions; all the happiness; all those hopes and all those dreams; some fulfilled, some yet to be; and all that I can remember today as if it just happened yesterday – that I will remember everyday, as long as I live.  How can someone be so lucky? 

To 1970 - and that Saturday night in October in Elmhurst where I kissed Debbie for the very first time.  And to the friend’s house whose parents were out – to their couch, their floor lamp, to their throw pillows; and to the Rolling Stones music.  Can you imagine being so young, so infatuated, and so in love? 

I still am.

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Giving our best…

Football is my favorite sport.  A bit ironic I suppose, because football is the epitome of a time in my life that I did not give my best.  Actually, it was worse than that.  It was the one time in all my competitive pursuits (athletics or in business) that I quit.  I’ve lost many times; won my share too.  Quit?  Once.

I quit my high school football team two weeks into the start of my junior year season.  It was the only time in my life that my Mom told me I disappointed her.  I can remember going into the head coach’s office to quit as if it was yesterday.  Totally ironic, because after being a starter and co-captain my freshman and sophomore years, I was not even planning to play my junior year.  I planned to focus on basketball. 

Over the summer the coach called and asked me to reconsider.  I agreed, but when I showed up I wasn’t prepared to give my best.  He and his coaches weren’t prepared to coach me up either.  At the age of sixteen, I decided that quitting was my only escape.  I’ve regretted it to this day.  It’s not the not-playing that I regret; it’s the not giving my best.

I bet there have been special coaches and mentors who have had a positive impact on your life.  Coaches come in all shapes and sizes and use a wide variety of styles and techniques.  Some coaches resonate with us; others don’t. 

Here’s a 6 minute movie clip about high school, an underdog team, and their coach’s expectation about giving one's best: Facing the Giants

Probably not a technique that transfers into the business world today - but the message does, true?  Yes, the sporting world is different than the business world.  Nonetheless, we don’t have to go it alone.  Even the best-of-the-best have coaches.

In business, our favorite, Unknown Sage offers this:

Common misconceptions about coaching in the marketplace: 

“Coaching is primarily for correcting behavior” - If we only coach people when they do something wrong, we have missed the point.  It’s about building not fixing. 

“Coaching requires giving up power and control” – The manager relies more on influence. The person is still accountable. 

“Coaching takes too much time” – Coaching takes too much time if you don’t do enough of it and you don’t do it correctly.

“Coaching is soft stuff” – The manager who avoids soft stuff usually does so because it is so hard.  The work is easy; people are difficult. 

“Coaching is laissez-faire management” – Freedom in the workplace, actually just about anywhere, is rooted in strict discipline. 

“Coaching is simply being a good cheerleader” – A good manager has the courage and inner strength when needed to tell people the truth. 

“Coaching is like therapy” – To be a good manager and coach one does need a basic understanding of human behavior and motivation, but therapy has no place in your relationship with the people you are leading.

Coaches enjoy occasional accolades, too.  The best I ever heard was a tribute to Bum Phillips, former head coach of the then, Houston Oilers.  It was once said of Bum:

He could take his and beat yours - and then he could take yours and beat his. 

As a coach, he was able to get his players to give their best; they had no quit.  Imagine – what could we accomplish if we committed to giving our best? 

GAP

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Is your world flat?

It’s been 11 years since I ventured out into the social media world for the very first time.  I know I wasn’t the original “explorer”, but it was still a big move for me.  Permit me to share an updated, slightly wordsmithed post from back in the day - beginning with 

People told Columbus the world was flat.  He didn’t insist it was round.  He got in a boat.  

                        3Com Advertisement 

How cool was that!  No debate; no argument; no headlines; no hype.  They said, “Impossible!” he said, “Get me to a boat!”  Then Columbus got in that boat (funded by an original venture capitalist); and proved his point.  

What a stellar example of commitment to success!  “Hey Chris, the world is flat you know.  If you go out there, you’ll sail right off the table into oblivion.”  “That’s OK”, he might have said, “I think we’ll be all right.”  He wasn't alone: 

What about you?  What are “they” saying you cannot do?  Do you agree with them?  Are you staying close to shore keeping land in sight to make you feel secure?  Or are you looking out across the vast ocean and on to your future?  Are you debating – or are you doing?  Where are you turning for the fuel to maintain your positive, can-do attitude?  

     It’s hard to beat a person who never gives up. 

                        Babe Ruth 

If you’re reading this, then you’re in my boat.  Welcome to The Peace & Power of a Positive Perspective©.  The next time you’re having one of “those days”, filled with too much negativity from “them”, come back aboard for a little positive reinforcement. 

It is the 21^st century after all.  Some people today might say, “Gary; Linked In, Face Book, Twitter are fun and all; but a vehicle for ongoing business-to-business, business?  Impossible!”  Well, what do I know?  

I spent over four decades of my career trying to perfect professional selling skills.  You know – permission-based prospecting; discovering the customer’s goals; presenting solutions… Remember?  Are any of those skills relevant today? 

Or have we in the sales profession shifted to Likes, TikToks, Tweets, and other, electronically-impersonal means of getting ink and contract to meet and money to change hands?  Were professional selling skills important only when the world was flat?  Well, what do I know? 

Best-selling business author Jim Collins wrote this: 

     The Tyranny of the OR vs the Genius of the AND.  

To me, it’s not social media – or – the old way.  I think social media is important.  I also believe that building trust still plays a key role in the customers’ success; and in turn, our success.  I would like to believe that knowing what you’re doing is still critical to a salesperson’s achievement.  Being a product expert + a technology expert + a competitive expert + a businessperson are the key characteristics our customers value.  But, what do I know? 

Similar to Christopher Columbus, no one can predict ahead of time what changes the online world will bring to the future of the sales profession.  I’m certainly not going to argue about it.  I’m just getting in my social media boat and setting sail – I believe I won’t fall off the face of the earth. 

I hope you join me for the voyage and visit https://gpokorn.blogspot.com/ often.  Bring a friend!  After all: 

No sense in being pessimistic.  It wouldn’t work anyway.    

                        Unknown Sage 

Here’s to the New World.  Thanks again Chris! 

                                                            GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

I want it…

A while back I wrote a little ditty about financially justifying the purchase of technology. (See Cost or Value).  Since I spent 40+ years in technology sales, I felt comfortable with my credentials in discussing sales justification. 

In that write-up I mentioned that there are "justifications" and then there are "justifications".  The main difference between the two is those deals where the customer "needs it" (usually to alleviate some sort of business "pain"); and those where the customer "wants it".  Which motivation do you think is more powerful? 

Have you ever spent more than you intended on something because you, or a loved one, not only needed it but wanted it?  Permit me to offer this little story about the power of want. 

When my younger son was 10 years old he was in his second year in a youth horse riding program. I have written about the Westernaires often.  Feeling confident in his commitment, my wife and I decided to buy him his own horse.  (He had been renting a Westernaires' string horse and needed his own to advance in the program.) 

We learned about the Bureau of Land Management's wild horse adoption program out of Canon City, Colorado where a Mustang could be adopted for $125.   Following adoption by properly caring for the horse and passing the BLM's inspections, you would receive ownership papers after two years.  I'm thinking… my son needed a horse; we could adopt one for $125; the investment justification seemed straight forward. 

Interestingly, the BLM adoption center in Canon City was located on the federal penitentiary grounds known then (and still today) as "Super Max".  It housed some of the most infamous criminals of modern times.  The "Una Bomber"; "El Chapo"; and other "worst-of-the-worst" killers.  But I digress… 

We went to an adoption event at the prison one spring day.  We were escorted by two armed guards the entire time.  I thought we were "just looking" for a horse.  After all, it was our first "presentation of a solution".  What I didn’t understand is that my wife, and more importantly my son, were there to "buy".  It was a little gray mingled among a herd of some sixty Mustangs that caught my son's eye.  The four year old horse had the coloring of a blue roan.  It was at that very moment he decided this was the Mustang he wanted. 

Silly me…  I'm thinking well it's only $125.  And if that was the horse to make my 10 year old son happy, then it was a pleasure to buy him a horse of his very own.  It was easy for me to "justify" the $125 "investment".  Well within our "budget".  Little did I know how the money works when it comes to horses. 

Within the first three months, here's what we actually spent for adopting that $125 Mustang: 

90-day training with feed, farrier, and gelding           $   600

Bridle, bit and reins                                                    $   250

Big Horn cordura saddle                                            $   400

Saddle blanket                                                            $     75

Halter and lead rope                                                    $     45

2-Horse, horse trailer to transport the horse                $2,500

Chevy Suburban (used) to haul the horse trailer        $6,000

                                                             Total cost        $9,870

That was a cost overrun of 7,896%!  But for the horse my son wanted?  Worth every penny.

Sooo, when selling to a buyer, it's nice to justify their spend based on what they need.  It's much more powerful to sell based on what they want.  Don’t you agree? 

                                                            GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective. 

Dressed for the part…

My wife and I just returned from vacation.  We visited our niece Lisa and nephew David in the Ocean Park area of Maryland.  Due to Covid, it was the first time we flew on an airplane in over 3 years. 

During our visit my nephew David noticed even in retirement and dressed casually, I see many things through the lens of business.  After a full career I guess that's something not easily turned off.  It's fun though (for me at least).  In business, especially in the sales profession, things are often not what they appear.  It takes a keen and disciplined view, or as Yogi Berra put it: 

            You can see a lot by observing. 

Saturday evening we went to a free concert in their community.  The outdoor patio area was, as Lisa would say, "bumper-to-bumper" with people; their cars in the parking lot; and boats in the marina.  Eclipse, a Journey cover band played from 6 to 10 pm.  They had the Ocean Pines Yacht Club rockin'!  I was dressed for the part: 

In addition to the great music and even better company with Lisa and David, I always get a kick from people watching.  I especially enjoy watching those from my generation who are…  well … old.  We don’t think of ourselves as old and my wife hates that description.  She prefers "seniors" or perhaps "elderly", but never "old". 

At the outdoor venue with perfectly warm weather one, gray-haired lady was dressed casually for the part including a walking cane.  She was sitting near us and enjoying the band with a group of "seniors".  To the casual observer she might have appeared… well… old.  Some might even have had concerns whether she would be too frail to walk back to the parking lot.  However, when the band played "Pour Some Sugar on Me" by Def Leppard, not only was she on her feet dancing with her friends, but I was close enough to see she was enthusiastically singing along.  She knew all the words!  Truly, my generation rocks! 

That evening I received several compliments about my shirt.  My niece wondered if I brought it on vacation specifically because of the concert.  I replied it was part that, and part coincidence.  After thinking about it further I realized my nephew had something in his comment about my business lens.  You see, throughout my sales career I was always trying to "dress for the part". 

I'm not sure how it works in today's modern, virtual, work-from-home business settings.  You don’t see many men suited up; wearing a necktie; sporting polished Wingtips.  A former Generation X colleague of mine once said, "Gary, I'm in software sales.  I don’t even own a tie let alone wearing one to work."  

Not only did I suit-up most of my career, but I even added suspenders back in the day when I was selling Oracle Financials (version 1.0 in 1989).  The software was expensive and buggy as hell - but I was dressed for the part.  I suppose Oracle wanted our prospects to feel our software was more mature and reliable than merely "betaware".  Oracle sales execs set the tone and we all added suspenders to our suit, tie, and Wingtips attire. 

Today, about the only people you see wearing suspenders are those from my generation who are … well… old.  But if you observe them carefully I bet you will see - they can still rock! 

                                                            GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

How’s your day been?

Five years ago this coming Monday, I was in an earthquake in Mexico City; a 7.1.  How do you work that into casual conversation? 

September 19, 2017 at 1:15 pm local time, a powerful earthquake shook the bejeezus out of my training class; our lunch break; my colleagues; and me!  Thankfully, no one in our group was hurt. 

Unfortunately, there were many in Mexico City and surrounding states that did get hurt; over 200 people killed; hundreds perhaps thousands injured.  According to The Guardian ©; 

It was the second major earthquake to hit Mexico in two weeks and came on the anniversary of the 1985 quake that devastated Mexico City, killing 5,000 people and destroying 10,000 homes. 

In fact, because of that 32^nd anniversary; commemorating the devastation; we actually had an emergency evacuation drill at 11am in 2017; about 2 hours before the real thing hit again! 

During the episode, I was conscious of the fact I was experiencing an earthquake – on the 19^th floor of a hotel no less.  What started out feeling like a freight train passing by causing the table to vibrate, quickly erupted into what seemed like a prolonged period of ferocious shaking.  I could not keep my feet. 

Those much braver than I were calling out; directing us towards the archway leading into the room.  Firmly they instructed us to move away from the windows; calmly, they reassured us that we will be alright.  Ultimately, we filed out onto the streets joining tens of thousands of others.

I remember looking out the window and seeing the glass buildings across the plaza actually swaying.  It was surreal.  It reminded me of the scene in movie The Matrix where a helicopter crash caused the façade of a glass office tower to ripple. 

So many had invested so much before the earthquake hit – and after.  Gustavo Moussalli, our Latin American Division Director and the executive sponsor for the class had made a huge commitment to his local partners; coordinating a 3-day enablement class to support their success. 

Gerardo Diez Martinez, our local Channel Manager arranged the meeting rooms and set-up; AV equipment; food and beverage; Gerardo spared no expense to insure we had everything we needed for his partners. 

My colleague Susanna Lagtapon sacrificed time away from her daughter’s 13^th birthday; traveling instead to join us for the class.  Our colleague, Tony Caporal, with cooler head and bravery, prevailed following the earthquake.  He helped us retrieve our laptops and luggage.  (Even stopping at the lobby bar to grab a free beer on his way out of the hotel.) 

Our VP, Brian Enright, was our “home base”; coordinating flights out of town; hotel reservations; and anything else he could do to support us from afar. 

And especially Hector Garcia from our long-time partner NetSoft.  Hector insisted on personally driving us to the airport; would not hear of us taking a taxi or a bus.  He would navigate us through the city streets; on constant vigil for our safety.  Three hours to drive us 12 kilometers.  Three hours in the opposite direction from his own home and family – taking us in his care. 

As with all disasters, there were many heroes – named and unnamed.  But that was 2017; Mexico City; and an earthquake.  Today, it’s another crisis; another natural disaster; another conflict. 

We are all thankful for so many first responders and other heroes – named and unnamed.  May God bless them all. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.

Dates never forgotten…

September 11, 2001 - we still remember.  What dates are never forgotten for you? 

In the novel, A Tale of Two Cities © is the contrast, “It was the best of times; it was the worst of times…” both occurring at the same time.  For many Americans, 9/11/2001 seems like a demarcation point between the best of times before that morning and the worst of times after.  That’s when terrorism literally collided into freedom.

Do you remember where you were when news and the images of the planes crashing into the World Trade Centers in New York City were broadcast?  I always will.  In a flash Americans were once again about to be tested on what we can endure during the worst of times.  

December 7, 1945 tested my parent’s generation; October 24-29, 1929 tested my grandparents’.  On a more personal level April 20, 1999 was the worst of times for Columbine High School in my hometown. 

It’s amazing what we can accomplish during the best of times; and what we can endure during the worst of times.  The bad times help us appreciate and enjoy the good times.  Here’s how Ernest Hemingway phrased it: 

Life breaks us.  And when we heal, we’re stronger on the broken parts. 

Our ability to gain strength from adversity should come as no surprise, though.  Our ancestry is made of up generations who were broken; endured; and then grew stronger. Is today’s adversity caused by gun violence, racial injustice, and other calamities akin? 

For those who did not suffer a direct loss of loved ones from the recent (and lingering?) pandemic, our hardships now come in the form of inconvenience and economics.  It’s more arduous today to keep up; we hear "supply chain disruptions"; housing prices are almost unreachable.  Things we once dreamed of seem further from our grasp.  Our available resources are nearing the breaking point.  

But for America, that’s nothing new.  Our country has been on the brink; had parts broken; and healed back stronger for as long as we have been a country.  Was the suffering from the Revolution, the Civil War, the Viet Nam War, the Civil Rights Movement, or any other national, local, family, or personal crisis less hard? 

We are again facing threats to our way of life; and indeed many of our life’s ways need to change.  We are strong enough to face these threats because we come from generations of strength - families who struggled to make for this country, for their loved ones, and for themselves the best of times.  Like past generations, Americans today will have to re-earn the better things in life.  Perhaps we first must re-learn what those better things are: 

To really enjoy the better things in life, one must first have experienced the things they are better than.  

Oscar Holmolka 

Sunday we will reflect on that never forgotten, life-changing event known as 9/11.  As impactful perhaps as  the day an American walked on the moon, or the night the men's Olympic hockey team won the gold medal to Al Michaels’ famous words, “Do you believe in miracles?”  Our Unknown Sage reminds us: 

The First Rule of Life: 

The best things in life aren't things.

America endured October 24^th, 1929; grew stronger after the December 7^th, 1941; my hometown stands firm following the April 20^th, 1999; we’ve overcome 9/11/2001.  Today, American must endeavor to re-unite again.  

We will succeed because we have never forgotten.                                 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.