Intensity …

A few years ago I participated in a week of sales training that included intensity – planned and unplanned.  It was during a time our company was re-organizing.  Re-orgs are intense, yes? 

That intensity helped set the stage for the training.  The trainers leveraged additional techniques including role plays (everybody’s favorite LoL!), shocking movie scenes, and blaring music to insure we paid attention and didn’t wander: 

My mind often wanders and sometimes leaves me all together. 

Unknown Sage 

The training was excellent.  More importantly, the leadership team succeeded in creating a safe environment enabling us to take our mind off of the re-org and practice new skills in front of our peers without fear of judgement: 

At 10,000 feet above sea level, there is a saying about the city of Leh in the Himalaya Mountains:  The passes are so high and the land is so barren, only a dear friend or serious enemy will reach here. 

Bryan Walsh 

All was going as planned until the last 15 minutes of the last day and a final moment of unplanned intensity.  Our VP asked for general feedback on the week and the group responded with unanimously positive responses.  She then asked for specific feedback on one particular session that I for one was negatively impacted by; shaken actually.  The room went quiet. 

I don’t think her choice to zero in about this one session was coincidental; I suspected she had suspicions.  She asked if it was “too much” – and a moment of intensity ensued. 

It’s hard to give negative feedback to your superiors, true?  It’s even harder in a group setting, among colleagues most of whom you have just met.  Fear during a re-org; worry over expressing yourself appropriately; concern over being misunderstood; all contribute to the intensity.  Peer pressure even for the most experienced can be intimidating: 

If you’re not part of the steamroller, you’re part of the road. 

Ed Lazowska 

Trustingly, I felt she was genuine in her desire to receive feedback.  I thought my new teammates would see I was a “dear friend” and not a “serious enemy” in trying to improve the training course. 

I took a deep breath; paused; thought about how to word my response; made eye contact; and then spoke up.  I was the only one to do so.  Intense. 

My response was – Yes; too much; and then I explained... 

I believe when conducting business-to-business training, we should avoid personal references to death; battlefield casualties; cancer; disabilities; mental illness; divorce; and sexual innuendo.  The trainers had woven all of these stimulants into the session in question to artificially increase the intensity. 

As trainers, we’re being watched.  We don’t know our audience personally.  In today’s day and age if we are not mindful, our audience can take things personally; be offended; shaken actually: 

Don’t wait for the last judgment.  It takes place every day. 

Albert Camus 

Coincidentally, the training in question occurred on the very morning of the Santa Fe Texas High School shooting.  Plenty of military style, references to killing dominated the news.   Coincidently, one of my colleagues told me that week he was going through a nasty, heart breaking divorce.  Coincidently, another colleague told me her best friend was just diagnosed with terminal cancer.  Coincidentally that very day was the birthday of one of the trainer’s sons who suffers from a devastating mental illness; bi-polar disorder.  My son. 

Life is intense enough – sales training doesn’t need to go there. 

GAP 

When life gets tough we could get a helmet… or… we could leverage the peace and share the power of a positive perspective.